Binge

I am a comfort/binge/escapist reader. I love to read. A whole long wall in our house is bookshelves, and all of those shelves are full. I'm not saying it's necessarily a good thing. When I read, especially when I read something interesting, something that grabs my attention, I succumb to it and let it take all of my attention. Laundry piles up, the dishes do too. Dinner, if made at all is made one-handed. If anyone wants to talk to me, they get the half-glazed look from me because my eyes are unfocused from reading.

My latest reading binge has come in the form of "The Little House Books." Girls, you know which ones I'm talking about. "Little House in the Big Woods" to "By the Shores of Silver Lake" to "These Happy Golden Years" and beyond. When my sister and I were young we read those books to pieces. She has since bought her own collection, and I need to do the same. I love all of the books in that series, but my favorite are "Farmer Boy," "Little Town on the Prairie" (who cannot love it when Almanzo Wilder first touches Laura's elbow and asks,"May I see you home?"), and "These Happy Golden Years." It's gotten me thinking about so many things:

• They worked so hard from dawn to dusk. I make my kids do chores in the morning and then they're done. Do I need to plant a bigger garden and throw bins of toys away to build character in my sons?
• So many times Laura talked about biting back words, breathing and thinking before she spoke. I know I could benefit from practicing that!
• They ate the same simple meals over and over and over again. I feel so spoiled and feel like I am spoiling my kids with all the choices we have for meals.
• It just feels like we have too much.

I've talked over this last one with J quite often. Sometimes it feels like I must be crazy because I don't know that other people feel the same way I do. I think that we have too much. Too many clothes, too many books and toys, too many choices, too many conveniences to help ease our way. Now, I know that I could go live in a yurt in the middle of nowhere. I'm nutty like that. I could be Amish if they let me. But I don't think that's the answer. We're counseled to "be in the world, not of the world," but where's the balance? I don't want to shelter my kids so much that they can't handle all that is out there once they're thrust into the world, but I don't want it to influence them too much growing up. Always fighting, fighting for balance. Any insight?